Today’s Daily Post: Changing colors, dropping temperatures, pumpkin spice lattes: do these mainstays of Fall fill your heart with warmth — or with dread?
I have mixed feelings about the approach of autumn. There are aspects of its arrival that I adore, such as:
* The way the leaves change to an array of crimson, gold, copper, and amber
* My mom’s homemade pumpkin bread
* Caramel apples (with nuts, of course)
* Apple cider
* The feeling of reflection. I’m not even sure how to explain it, but I feel the need to pause, evaluate, analyze, and come to peace with what the year has brought thus far
* The drop in humidity–meaning I can comfortably jog outdoors in a shirt and pants, all while admiring the change in color scheme of the trees
* Corduroy pants
* Going back a few points, I should add my mom’s cooking in general. Oh, I could write an entire post on my mother’s cooking skills…
* Pumpkin spice coffee creamer. On a side note, I should add that I was met with cries of indignation when I revealed to my coworkers on Friday that I have yet to try a pumpkin spice latte (despite being a coffee drinker)
* The return of baking season. Cakes, cupcakes, cookies… it’s so much easier to have the oven going when it isn’t 90°+ outside (or inside my tiny shoebox condo)
However… as much as I treasure these aspects of the season, fall has been the time of year in which my resolve is tested. My greatest and most laborious trials have occurred at this time year after year for the past decade. The big three romantic relationships I’ve had began to fall apart mid-September; (1) the heartache; (2) the heart crush; (3) the heart obliterated–all in that order, no less.
I do not wish to revisit those haunts today. Right now there is a lovely breeze wafting through my open patio. From the hill beyond the parking lot, the leaves–only slightly gold in some places–flutter and swirl on their branches. I sip my pumpkin spice coffee and watch my cats nap comfortably on piles of fleece blankets. A few birds chirp in the distance.
But it is because of those experiences that caused me to begin my quest to accomplish something I have tried to do for years. I am now a full year cigarette-free. I have no intentions of going back to smoking, no matter what. And that is something to celebrate.
Just as I hope to celebrate more aspects of this season, as I have not in the past three years. I plan to attend the annual Halloween party, rather than hide out at home, wishing the holiday would disappear, the way some singles do for Valentine’s Day. Jillian will be here. I haven’t seen her in a year. Joe will be visiting for Thanksgiving–I’ve not seen him in 5 years. I’m hoping that there can be trips to the Morton Arboretum in the next month, as well as the zoo. I love Brookfield, as well as Lincoln Park. Perhaps, if I get to LPZ, I will finally get to see the evasive red panda. Both zoos are places I love to go to in autumn, as it’s cool and the animals are more active. But zoo lights at Christmas… walking around, bundled up, something hot to drink, cheeks hurting from both the cold and constant smiling, the dazzling array of colorful lights… Oh, that is the best.
So while I may listen to Green Day’s “Wake Me Up When September Ends” on a (nearly) daily basis this month, I still say that the loves outweigh the loathes of this time of year.